Look at all the fucks I give: 2014

Ok so it's the New Year. Everything feels the same, and nothing really changes. Even if everyone around you is running to the gym, talking about their special diet plans or how they plan on making this the year of self improvement. Blah blah, it's all the same. Tomorrow is just as good of a day to start reaching your goals.

 I read this article recently and I decided to take my own stand of Fucks I Refuse to Give 2014. Naturally my favorite thing to do is not give a fuck, so it was pretty easy. See, that's my "Fucking kidding me?" face.

1. Exercise and eating healthy
one of the biggest resolutions people make every year is to start eating healthy and exercising more. Eh.. No thanks. I like to get Wendy’s French fries at least once a month, and that nap I’m going to take in the middle of my day definitely trumps any treadmill I’ve ever met.

2. Making moments count
There are moments that mean a lot, and then there are moments that just don’t mean crap. Trying to make the most out of running errands and spending countless hours in my car that smells like wet dog? Yeah, fuck that.

3. Being happy and positive all the time
I just don’t have it in me. Some days I’m nice, other days I’m not. Some days I couldn’t care less if the sun is shining, and really that’s just fine with me.

4. Swearing
Generally every other word out of my mouth is shit or fuck, and well shit I’m ok with that. I don’t need to have a squeaky clean vocabulary.

5. Liking everyone and being in social situations voluntarily
If you were to ask me what one of my least favorite, most hated, biggest feared activity is.. I’d tell you being in a social situation. I’m really terrible at small talk, most topics that come up for conversation bore the snot out of me, and my sarcasm is rarely ever gotten. I even get sweaty palms just thinking about talking to someone I don’t know very well. Why? Most of the time I just don’t like people. I don’t like hearing about their mundane job, water cooler chit chat, what new fad diet they’re trying out, or other bullshit people talk about to fill the void of silence.

6. Fitting in
My extreme distaste of social situations, mixed in with my avoidance to all colors other than black make it so I’ve always stood out a little from others. And eh who cares?

7. Being on time
I’ve always felt time is a man made concept, and I’ve always had a hard time basing my life around it. With work I’m very restricted by times. Having to get everything done in a certain time frame or meeting with clients at specific times, and I just hate it. So in my personal life I rebel and am always extremely early or extremely late.

8. My car
I drive a beaten up ’98 Corolla that my girl friend bought for $300. We’ve had it for almost 2 years now, and it gets me from point a to point b. I’m done feeling self conscious over how beat up it is. That big scratch down one side, and the giant dent in the other side.? Who the fuck cares? The fact I have to roll down the window to open the driver’s side? Oh well, shit happens. At least it’s cheap, and I drive dogs around in it all day so it doesn’t have to be perfect.

9. Guilt, feeling bad, or having to explain myself
Some days I’m really tired and I don’t want to do anything but space out. These days could even go on for two or three; I just need a little down time especially when I don’t have any guaranteed time off work. Some nights I don’t want to cook dinner, I just want to sit on my couch not making every moment count in my pajamas.

10. Wearing real pants
I’ve always hated wearing jeans, ever since I was a little kid. And this year I’m not going to make myself wear them if I don’t want to. So there.

11. Planning my future
I’m a shit planner, and I always make changes to my plans. So how the hell am I supposed to plan for a future Ill always end up changing my mind on?

12. Cleaning my house
I hate it. I’ll do a big clean once a month, and I’m done guilt tripping myself about not doing it more often.

13. Reading more
I love to read, but the more pressure I put on myself to read the less I read. I’ll read if I want to, and I won’t if I don’t want to.

14. Caring about my social life
I’m self employed, barely ever have a day off, and don’t ever know what my schedules going to be like tomorrow.. So planning to get together with friends isn’t easy, and usually it’s tiring. I don’t think it’s wrong that my social life is non-existent. Every year I try to change it, but this year I don’t give a shit. Pfffttt. 

So bring on this year. I'm turning 28, and my don't give a shit meter is filling up fast. 

xo

 

the good, the bad, and the in-betweens

I’ve been in hiding a lot recently. From friends, from the internet, from just about everything and everyone. A lot is going on, and then again nothing at all is happening. I’m just busy, over worked, and tired. The tune of the working woman, eh?

I haven't had the inspiration to blog.. maybe I can change that with some random blabbings.

:: The Good

We found out some months ago that our landlord, who lived below us, was selling the house we live in. We found all this out when he decided to have someone come view the property (IE: our apartment) on two separate occasions. He refused to tell us he was selling until the day he actually sold it. We got a text at 11pm saying we had new landlords.

Ok, stressful. We aren’t in the best of spots financially, nor emotionally, and couldn’t imagine having to pack up and move before the holiday season. We stressed about it for a few days until we had our meeting with the new landlord. And everything went great. They turned out to be the nicest little family and they were so nervous about asking us to put the garbage out on the curb.

PHEW! Our apartment is quirky and looks like a religious Grandmother went to an antique store. We’ve made it our home and couldn’t imagine moving out, just yet at least. 

:: The Bad

My dog has been dealing with chronic heart failure for the past 6 months or so. She has good days, and bad days. Most days are good, but on the off days it’s really difficult to think of what lays ahead of us. She’s reached a high daily dosage of diuretics, receiving pills every 8 hours, and she’s on 5 different pills. She was going to the cardiologist weekly, and now she just needs to go in if she shows signs of a worsening condition. We know what is going to happen, eventually her kidneys will give and the true battle begins. I know she’ll let me know when it’s too much for her to fight anymore, and every day I’m thankful I still have her in my life.

It doesn’t make things any easier and I struggle to stay out of a dark haze most days. I don’t feel like myself, and I’m already in mourning. I often get pangs in my chest, as if my heart is already breaking, and I haven’t even lost her yet. It’s just.. hard. 

Her thing lately is farting and humping her favorite toy. So, really things aren't as dire as I make them seem. She's just.. my everything. 

The In-between

Work has been ever increasing, the holiday season being one of our busiest times of year. I’m averaging on 3 – 4 new client consultations a week, and I just had to extend my calendar to accommodate all the last minute bookings. I’m still amazed at how many people wait until such last minute to schedule pet sitting.

I’m almost all done with my Christmas shopping! This is impressive for me, I usually wait until two weeks before hand..

I’m slowly motivating myself to do more DIY, at home projects. I am always on the go, so finding the time on this one is hard. I have to make time, I do suppose.. 

Cheers to surviving Thanksgiving at my girlfriends parents house.

xo

 

just a dash of this and that

Last week I got to live up the bachelor lifestyle. Staying up past midnight, having dinner with friends, and watching whatever I wanted on Netflix.

Well, not really. I stayed up late every night because I was having a hard time sleeping. I had dinner with friends to avoid not being able to sleep and really hating cooking lately. And Netflix? I didn’t turn it on once. I was all about the NatGeo youtube channel. More specifically, The Dog Whisperer. A few silent tears were shed, I'm not going to lie.

Kh was out of town and I mostly just caught up on work.

This past weekend we did some of this. 

And this.

 We also saw Insidious 2 and went out to eat a lot. I'm in a "stay out of the kitchen and don't go near the stove" kind of mood lately.

And then I made her go shopping with me on Sunday. 

My loot included: 

 

2 new pairs of flats

3 pairs of leggings

one tank top with a crochet bottom hem

one black cardigan

one tunic with a pattern on it 

I put a little color in my wardrobe.. Kind of.

Boomm. Bandit style.

Now I’ve been bit by the shopping bug and just want to buy sweaters and boots. 

It's 9pm and I can't wait for bed. My insomnia has been creeping back in, forcing me to get very little, to extremely terrible sleep every night. I'm a creature that needs at least 9 hours of sleep or I'm useless and cranky. So, I'm useless and cranky right about now. 

xo

 

it was our anniversary and im obsessed with avocados

Three years ago, on the 10th, Kh and I had our first date. It was only after I stalked her a little, on facebook that she finally asked me out.

I was working in a salon; she was a client of someone I had known for years. Someone I had known for years, and even worked at another salon with. We had never crossed paths until then. I saw her, and thought she was the most handsome person ever. She was wearing business casual, her button up shirt tucked in to her pants, a side bag looking like a briefcase. I was a bit smitten.

So naturally I did what any self-respecting person in this day and age would do, I came across her profile on facebook through a girl that I was on again-off again sleeping with, and added her.

She likes to say this is the part where she was all “Whattt! I think the hot girl from the salon is adding me on facebook! What do I do!” To which her best friend replied, “When a hot 24 year old wants to be your friend, you don’t question it, you just do it.”

We met up on a Saturday in the early evening after I got off work. We went to a low-key bar, and talked for hours. Afterwards, she walked me the entire way home, which was about an hour and some change.

From that moment on, our dates lasted well into the morning hours, and it was hard to separate when we did have to say our goodbyes. To do things like go to work and sleep. It took her around 3 months to finally kiss me, and we still joke about her calling us a situationship for the better part of that first year.

I don’t know where I’d be without her in my life. She’s my rock, and keeps me sane.

She also buys me amazing gifts like a sterling silver caste vertebrae of some small animal. 

 On our actual anniversary we went out to seafood restaurant I'd never been to before. The atmosphere was really so loud we couldn't chat, but we were able to make ridiculous hand gestures and goof around. 

I am loving vodak infused iced tea drinks lately. Delicious. 

For an appetizer we got BBQ shrimp, and practically fought over it. They were amazing. 

My meal looked like this. And while that doesn't look appetizing in the least bit, and seriously who would even second glance at it.. The big chunk of a thing in the front is half of an avocado, grilled with pineapple salsa in it. Can i just say? AHHHHHmazing. I've been on an avocado overload ever since.

I put avocado in my eggs yesterday morning, on my salad the day before, and today I have big plans for the half of avocado I'm squirreling away in the fridge. I might overdose on it. 

It's Monday and I don't really want to get a move on the rest of my week. Yesterday I laid on the couch and watched episode after episode of Lost. I'm finally watching it after all the hype has passed. It was great barely having any work to do and being to hungover to really do any work to begin with. 

xo

this is my obligatory I saw fireworks post

I could go on about how busy I’ve been with work, and how my social life is nonexistent. I could tell you about how I just want to start my own “Stay at Home Club” and never leave my dark AC climate controlled living room. But really, how much fun is that?

In case you were wondering, not much at all, and it’s my life right now. 

On the upside I realized a new season of The Killing is currently on TV. Since I don’t have cable, I made the $17.99 investment and bought it on iTunes. I managed to watch all 7 episodes yesterday, and even get Kh sucked into the show. I just love Enos, she’s my new gf. Even if it made me have crazy crime drama dreams all last night.

Ok. So let’s talk about what I did around this all American holiday. On the 3^rd Kh, our two friends and myself went up to Gloucester to watch the annual fireworks. We sat next to a canal, watching boats head out to the harbor. I love watching drawbridges go up, and secretly was more thrilled about this part than the actual explosions in the sky.

The downside? I forgot to put on bug spray and got eat-the-fuck-up by some would not quit it mosquitoes. 

The fireworks were.. fireworky. Colorful explosions in the sky. Afterwards we stopped at a Roast Beef place and I got a strawberry milkshake that tasted like strawberry Nesquick mix, and it was delicious.

On the actual 4^th, we spent the day having a cookout poolside at Kh’s bestie and her girlfriends’ house. The pool belongs to their landlords, who were away for the holiday week. Prior to leaving they had let their friends know they could come use it, so of course their friends did. With 4 children in tow.

We spent most of the 4^th trying to have a larger ratio of gays always present, and discussing never really wanting to have children. As the children ran amok eating anything we left on the table and kicking Kh in the pool. 

We brought the girls with us, let them freak out over puppy ice cream and play on the grass. Cuteness.

 We even got Lucy to go swimming. She hated me for it, but it was real cute. I'd share a video we made, but it has me talking in it, so no way Jose. 

 I came home and promptly passed out. The only thing I want in my life these days is to take sporadic naps and get rid of my tan.

That’s essentially what I’ve been up to. This weekend we went out for dinner Friday night, and I spent the rest of the weekend working, and trying to keep up my hermit status. I finished a book I was pretty disappointed with, painted a few sea creatures, and became obsessed with avocado and black beans in scrambled eggs. Pretty eventful, right? I am such a party animal.

And now I want avocado in my eggs.

 

xo

at least it's not monday anymore, or my awkward moment of the week

My least favorite, and by far the most awkward part of my job, is the client consultations. It’s one of those necessary evils. If I want new clients, I have to make time to meet said new clients.

And meeting said clients takes place in their homes, with just me and them in attendance. Kh refuses to go with me, I can't blame her. These things suck. I thankfully have only had one instance where I felt incredibly uncomfortable.  For the most part, I just see a lot of dirty houses, clutter, or meticulously cleaned apartments.

Last night I had my first crotch shot.

Ok let me back track. I scheduled a client consultation for 6:30pm. I spent the better half of my afternoon with the time 5:30 stuck in my head, boy was I heart broken when I realized I can’t keep track of shit and I was way off.

We had a heavy downpour just as I’m walking out to my car. I get in, look at my directions once more and then drive off. All the while sheets of rain are pouring down on my windshield, the wet spots on my jeans are now cold in the warm air from my car.

I arrive just outside the woman’s apartment 20 minutes early. I call my mom and chat with her about absolutely nothing until I can head inside.

I ring the doorbell and hear footsteps coming down the entryway staircase. A tall, slender woman in her mid-30’s greets me. She’s wearing a red dress that’s tight on top, flowy on the bottom and a belt that can’t seem to get tight enough around her tiny waist. She’s wearing sandal wedges, which helps her be at least 5” taller than me.

I greet her politely and shake her hand. She heads up the stairs first, thankfully. I hate it when I have to navigate my way to a place I’ve never been before.

We go on a hunt to find both of the cats. One of them is lying in her room on her blindingly white bed. I have to step over piles of clothes and shoes to get to the cats. I wasn’t prepared for an obstacle course. We stand there awkwardly chatting, me trying to ignore the giant mosquito netting she has hanging above her bed, until I finally push the meeting along and ask to see the rest of their stuff.

Fast forward to us in the kitchen. She drops the bomb that I need to visit twice a day and one of the cats needs medication. It’s always something, and people don’t like to tell you beforehand.

I have a lot of experience administrating medications to pets, but she decides to show me how the cat takes his pill. She puts the pill inside a ‘pill shooter’ and kneels down to try and coax him over.

So here’s the mental image. The tall sinewy woman in her flowy red dress, kneeling, no, squatting, with her butt touching the backs of her heels. Her legs are close together as she continues to try and talk this cat into coming closer to her.

The next several of minutes go down like this.

The cat slowly starts to saunter over to her, all the while her legs spread farther apart. Soon she has the cat facing me between her legs, with her legs wide open. The red flowy dress is not helping her in this situation, as it’s caught on her knees.

The cats face is directly blocking my view of her crotch. I don’t think she has underwear on.

My first instinct is to stand up and start looking at something else.

My second instinct is to see if she actually has underwear on.

I go with my second instinct. I shift my focus back and am completely relieved to see she has peach colored underwear on. Ok, slightly less awkward.

I stand up and try to make talking to her as painless as possible. I try to make sure my expression doesn’t convey “Ok lady I just saw your pantie crotch shot.”

She shows me how to use a set of keys, and I make a b-line for the door.

The monthly award for most awkward client consultation goes to this one.

xo

im ready for my vacation now, just dont make me try on anymore swimsuits

I’ve mentioned it about a million times, but this coming Friday I leave for a four-day weekend in Mexico.

I’m pretty much beside myself and can’t function as a normal human being until I’m on that plane.

We have someone staying at our house to watch the girls (aka our dogs), all of my clients are aware I’ll be away, I have my away message all raring to be put on display, and holy crap I need to be away already.

Last night Kh and I got a little over zealous and looked at 600+ photos of the resort we’ll be staying at on TripAdvisor.  I needed to get a better idea of what I should plan on wearing, I know, a little silly right?

I bought 5 pairs of shoes for this upcoming trip, or rather Summer in general really. 4 pairs of sandals, and one pair of wedges. This isn’t including the pair of sandals I bought last minute at an end of season sale last Fall. I probably only plan on bringing 4 pairs with me, however. Kh doesn’t think that’s reasonable, but I completely do.

On her way home this past Friday she stopped in to H&M real quick to get some shorts and dress pants for herself and ended up buying me a vacation purse. I’m pretty much the luckiest girl ever. She knows my style so well she can buy things for me. Uh, true love.

I also found this super cute maxi dress at Kohls, surprisingly enough. It has multi-color triangles on the bottom. While shocking it’s not all black, I’m pretty much in love with it.It's in the top right, the others just didn't do it for me.

Tomorrow when my household settles down a bit more, I plan on doing some last minute shopping. I need to get at least two more bathing suit tops (shoot me now, kay?), and one (who am I kidding, a couple more) maxi dresses.

I’m mentally preparing myself for the saga that is trying on a swimsuit. A couple of years ago I found the cutest two-piece, tank/halter top swimsuit in the maternity section at Target. Do I care its maternity? Not in the slightest. It’s got a scalloped edge on the bottoms and fits my curves.

On my last adventure to Target I thought I’d try on a few (4) bathing suits to humor myself. And humor myself it did not. The two that humored me the least?

The first one was a one-piece, with a built in padded bra situation. The particular size I was trying on fit me great in the mid section. But if you cast your eyes lower you’d look upon the forming of a camel toe, and if your eyes wandered upwards you’d find my boobs strangely getting choked down, but not even remotely filling up the padded cups that were sewn haphazardly into the top of the swimsuit. Like some kind of stretched out taffy with a ping pong ball in the end. And by ping pong ball I mean a nipple and my hard boob parts.

The second one was a black halter top that fit great, but the bottom portion of it let me say hello to my old friend camel toe that I had just seen a glimpse of previously. It also strangely rode up my butt crack and wouldn’t even come close to middle of my hips.

I left Target feeling like I had been slapped with a heavy dose of body shame and sprinkled with some self-loathing. Do you know how I changed it?

I got naked. Stood in front of my mirror and said “fuck you Target bathing suits.”

Of course I waited until I was home to do all of the above-mentioned naked shenanigans. But that’s generally what I do when I’m having a day when I feel less than or some how not fully whole as a result from shitty fitting rooms and ill fitting clothing.

So in closing. I’m going to fucking Mexico in 5 days and my mind is completely shot. I will be sitting my ass in a chair, on a gorgeous beach, drinking before noon, and writing in one of my many blank notebooks. I plan on clearing my head, centering myself, and probably drinking too much and chasing an iguana around.

xo

just in hiding

I know. I've been avoiding this blog for quite a while now.

Shits going down in my real life, and my slightly manic mind can't handle too much at a time.

I'll be back soon. To explain, and generally tear apart all that's happened in my life in the past week and a half. It's not very pretty, it's not very nice, and it's definitely breaking my heart.

But. That's life. I'll report soon on all that's happening.

For now. My waffle fries have finally cooled down. My sixth glass of wine is running out, it's almost 11:30pm, and this gal is running out of dexterity to type all of this out.

xo

stream of conscious sunday : a little alone time

On Friday I dropped Kh off at the subway station, and watched her disappear from my review mirror. She was on her way to a flight out West. To sunny California (at least it’s got to be sunnier than Massachusetts).

She’s going to be gone until next Friday. Her company is doing some work for TED, and she’s one of the lucky few that get to go. They went last year, and she got to tweet with Bill Nye. Neat, right?

I mean, Bill Nye tweeted her scribing, and then she retweeted his tweet of her scribing and they took a picture together.  Does that all make sense? Twitter confuses me!

When we first started dating, Kh was often traveling for work. Brussels, Germany, London, all over the US. But within the past year or so her promotion and role has changed considerably and she doesn’t travel nearly as much. We lived in different apartments then, and it was easy to get my alone time. Now I have to squeeze it in whenever I can.

The first afternoon without her coming home to dinner I’m all “le sigh”. Then the second day I’m all “ok, I can do this, lets get shit done!” But after that I slowly get lonely and miss the shit out of her. I've been making her facetime with me instead of talking on the phone, this way I have to pay attention and can't jut "uh huh" her to death. 

Ohhh do I love my alone time. 

My top 5 favorite things to do when I’ve got the apartment to myself. And try not to think of anything dirty here people. That’s usually a given.

1: I find any and every excuse to take a million naps on the couch.
2: I stay up until 1am drinking wine until I’m either too tired or to drunk to stay awake any longer.
3: I watch tv shows like The Vampire Diaries, because no ones here to yell at me and tell me it’s crap.
4: I go on a culinary tour of exotic places via my foodler account.
5: At the very last possible moment I rush around doing various chores to make it seem like I didn’t spend the entirety of my time alone doing all of the above. This is my least favorite, it means dishes.

I’m using this next week as a time to recharge myself. I’ve been running low on steam, and letting a lot of every day things slip by me.  I haven’t been in a positive, nor productive mindset in what seems like a very long while, and my mission this week is to kick my own ass back into gear. Whether it be finishing projects that have been sitting on the shelf, do some early Spring cleaning, or finally take that last step needed to be on my own business wise. I’m going to get it done. And I’m not going to be watching any paranormal movies while doing it. Serial killers? No problem. Psychotic disfigured beasts on a rampage? Ok, let’s do it. But ghosts? Scare the shit out of me when I’m alone. 

xo

stream of conscious sunday: insta-crazy

I’ve decided on Sundays I’m going to try and write about something going on in my personal life that’s making me feel guilty, or just something I need to get off my conscious. Or just random bull from my life in general.

Just recently I blocked my very first user on instagram. I’ve had instagram for a long ass time now, and for me to just now be blocking someone; you know it must be serious.

I do contracting work for a local-ish company. With this come a lot of consultations, meet and greets, schmoozing. This past Monday we had a client consult at my house for an overnight boarding request. This is the first time the owner of the company I contract for was at my house. It weirded me out a little, but a lot of things weird me out. Like peanut butter and jelly in the same container, or belly shirts.

What tipped the line of weird-stephanie out? The second she walked in the door she introduced herself to Kh and said she “practically knows her from all my posts on instagram.” Then she tripped up and even said that I was a “post-a-thon-er.”

Eh, what? Kh instantly turned red, and I played it off like “yeah sure, I’M the insta-crazy here.”

Over the next week I couldn’t stop thinking about how she pretty much said she stalked me on instagram. I don’t know her at all, and what I do know of her, I'm not overly fond of. So after getting over my guilt for not wanting her in my business, and getting the "it's ok" talk from my friends, I googled how to block someone on instagram.

I know it seems a little weird, since I have plenty of people I don’t know following me on instagram. But there’s a fine difference between people you don’t know and could potentially get to know, and someone that’s in your life that you completely don’t know, and possibly don’t want to know. There’s also that unwritten rule about never revealing you stalk someone online. My grandma breaks this one often.

“I saw those pictures your friend N posted on facebook, where was she? Who is that guy she’s with? Is that her cat? Did she buy new boots?”

Gram, shhhhh.

Am I crazy for doing this? Maybe. I still feel a little guilty about it, but since then I’ve made my profile private and I’m on lockdown. I know the internet and any public forum is fair game, but blocking features exist so why not use them? 

xo

a hairy history

  --> There you have it. The history of my hair in pictorial form starting with little high school me. Yeah I was in a tube top bra and stockings. Didn’t everyone hang out in their bathroom like that? Then we move on to college me, first move to Boston me, Philadelphia and Portland me, Salem me, and this past Summer me.

A couple of photos show my natural hair color.

Gosh do I miss my angled bob..

I’ve made the decision recently to grow my hair out. I’m quite sure once I get the long hair I’m aiming for, I’ll hate it and want to cut it all off again. I’m ready for a bit of change, even if it means being a hair-hating grouchy pants until I get it.

My good friend, who happens to be my hair stylist (and has been doing my hair on and off since I was 19) stays at my house every 6 weeks when he comes up from Florida to do clients at the old salon I used to work at. This works out smashingly for me, as I get salon quality cuts in my kitchen. (So does Kh.)

This time around he brought up some extensions that we’re going to color match to my hair and throw in to frame my face. Yes, and yes! And don’t be fooled, by color match I simply mean we’re dying it the same box-color I dye my own hair. Box color’s pretty bad for your hair, but ain’t nobody got time to go to the salon! (By time I mean money).  I’m even more excited by the fact I don’t need to go back to the salon I used to work at to get it done. Yeahhhhh-whoooo!

My hairs going to go through several stages. All of which I’m going to hate immensely.

Right now I’m at the helmet head stage.  My hair grows out in a thick bulky mess and then starts to lengthen. My head looks about 2x bigger with all this hair just hanging out on the top of it.

I won’t scare you away with photos of that look, but tomorrow I’ll have a new cut and some fine ass extensions to be whipping around.

xo

im a walking heart on

Valentines Day. Pffffttttttt! (if you were wondering, that’s a fart sound coming out of my mouth.)

Kh and I recently took a trip to Target. I found myself walking through the seasonal section and seeing nothing but prepackaged chocolate filled cardboard hearts, lollipops shaped like glistening beacons of love (ew?), and bears clutching to hearts with LOVE written in white script. I was probably more irritated by the apparent lack of Reese's peanut butter treats than anything else.

I, personally, have been over Valentines Day since I grew my first pube.

In my high school days the weeks leading up to Valentines Day were absolute torture. My hickville school had a fundraiser that allowed people to buy roses for girl friends, boy friends, secret admirers, crushes, you name it. You could send them anonymously or put a name to it. I would hold my breathe during homeroom secretly wishing I’d get a lame-ass rose. I never did, womp womp. Not even from a friend. My blonde haired, cheerleader best friend? Oh, she got plenty over the years.

Bitter? Yeah, a little.

 I dated a guy long distance for most of my late teens, and the most memorable Vday gift I received was a box containing a bear, chocolate shaped hearts, and a wooden “Dutch” love spoon. Complete with a heart on the handle. Yeah, seriously. His uncanny way of picking out the perfect gift was only matched by his tribal armband tattoo and love of Transformers.

Ok, fast forward over 10 years later. Last year Kh surprised me with a rose and tickets to see Casablanca (one of my favorites of all time) on the big screen playing at a local theater. I love that she knows me well enough to surprise me like that. It really takes a lot to get to know me, I’m a tough cookie.

I love her every day of the year. Tuesdays, Fridays, and even on mornings when she forgets to pour me a cup of coffee. I believe our relationship goes a bit beyond making sure we send each other flowers and a card on a random day in February. I put a lot of thought into each gift I give/make her, and I’m so thankful to have her in my life. Even if I hate Valentines Day and its manufactured consumerism with the after taste of love.

What I’m getting at is I’m completely stumped what to make her this year. Womp womp.  

xo

 

coffee talk numero dos

Nemo finally hit and hit pretty damn hard.  So, my ass is snowed in. Snowed in with 4 dogs, and a stir crazy girlfriend. Do you know what that means? A lot of naps for me. Kh is going nuts trying to hook up the Wii so we can play MarioKart and I can slaughter her ass in Sonic.

I was on a roll last night and finished 3 new dream catchers, so that’s something right? Today while snowed in I’m going to link up with Natalie @ 23Seventeen for her last ever coffee talk. I’m pretty sad about this, but I’m hoping to keep up the tradition and have my own random-bullshitting posts on Thursdays. I do love a random fact filled post.

1. What’s for dinner tonight?
I’d like to say skip it and donut holes but since I’m stuck here, I might as well make myself useful and cook. I made chocolate chip pancakes for breakfast, and I’m thinking vegeterian chili and cornbread is what’s on the menu tonight.

2. Top 3 tv shows you never miss.

We don’t have cable, so I miss all the shows. I do have Hulu and used to watch a couple of shows here and there. Mostly when I work or do admin things. I got sucked into Supernatural, Law&Order SVU, and Grimm for a long time.

3. What type of body wash are you currently using?

I think I’m still on a mango apricot kick, but I could be wrong. I’m horrible at keeping track of those things. Maybe its coconut? Hrmm.. I’ll tell you what right now I smell like I’ve been in my pajamas for an entire day, so it’s definitely not helping me figure out what my body wash is..

 4. Take a photo of what’s in front of you. 

 (Pretty exciting right? Kh hooking up the Wii)

5. What’s your favorite fruit?

Strawberries, pineapple, kiwi, oranges.. I like fruit.

6. Spring is almost here, show me your go-to outfit! 
What can I say? While others are loving floral prints and pastel hues, I'm sticking with my same old black on black until there's something darker. I love wearing light cardigans and blazers over tank tops, it's always to chilly to just rock a tank top here in New England during the Spring.

 :: outfit :: my profile on polyvore ::

xo